By Tinka Denisheva

“Tinka, I’m trying everything…” she told me after one of my workshops. “I’ve changed my look. I show up at every networking event. I cheer on others. But… they still don’t trust me.”I’ve seen this over and over again: strong, smart women doing everything they can to be seen… yet feeling unseen where it truly matters: in trust. Because trust doesn’t come from effort alone. It comes from human connection, grown over time, not from hustle or polish.

The psychology behind trust and community

According to Belongingness Theory by psychologists Roy Baumeister and Mark Leary, humans have a core need to form lasting, meaningful relationships. If they don’t feel safe or connected, they hesitate. In business, that means people won’t work with you or promote you until they feel emotionally safe with you.

Trust is the bridge between being visible and being believed. And that bridge isn’t built on noise. It’s built on humanity.

Connection beats perfection

Many women enter a room armed with flawless pitches and perfect poses. But people don’t trust perfection—they trust authenticity.

Be real. Share why you’re here. Ask questions. Listen deeply. Trust grows when people feel seen, not when they’re being sold to.

Three women who built empires on trust—and how much they’re worth today

• Rihanna (Fenty Beauty & Savage X Fenty): Rihanna launched Fenty Beauty with 40 inclusive foundation shades—telling women everywhere “you belong.” That authenticity built trust fast. As of early 2025, Rihanna’s net worth is estimated at $1.4 billion, primarily driven by her beauty and fashion empire.
• Estée Lauder (Estée Lauder Companies): She gave women free beauty samples and taught routines herself, building credibility one woman at a time. Today, the Lauder family’s combined net worth is estimatedat around $25–40 billion, reflecting their lasting legacy in beauty.
• Oprah Winfrey (Harpo/OWN/Media Empire): Oprah shared her life vulnerably for decades, building a trusting, global audience. Her authenticity made her a household name. As of 2025, her net worth is estimated at $3.2 billion.

These women didn’t buy trust—they earned it through connection, consistency, and community.

Seven steps to start building real trust today

1. Be a familiar face.
   Show up consistently in a few communities instead of trying to be everywhere. Familiarity builds recognition, and recognition breeds trust.
2. Listen more than you speak.
   Ask genuine questions. Make others feel heard and understood. People naturally trust those who truly listen.
3. Create micro-moments of care.
   Send follow-up messages, share helpful resources, or make introductions without expecting anything in return. Small acts leave a big impression.
4. Show your “why” openly.
   When people understand what drives you, they connect emotionally with you. Lead with purpose, not just product.
5. Let others speak your name.
   Deliver such genuine value that others recommend you when you’re not in the room. That’s trust on autopilot.
6. Stand steady when it’s hard.
   Reliability during challenges builds more trust than charm during good times ever could.
7. Give without keeping score.
   Support others freely. Celebrate their wins. True generosity lays a foundation of trust that lasts for years.

Your three-week trust-building action plan

If you’re serious about turning visibility into trust, here’s a simple, focused plan you can follow starting today:

Week 1 – Show up with intention

• Choose two key networking events or communities and commit to attending both this week.
• Prepare three authentic conversation starters that don’t include “What do you do?”
• Schedule time to engage meaningfully online (comment, share insights, congratulate others).

Week 2 – Create micro-moments of connection

• Follow up with at least five people you met last week with a kind, personal message (no selling).
• Share one valuable resource or introduce two people to each other without expecting anything in return.
• Post something personal about why you do what you do to let others see your “why.”

Week 3 – Build consistency and advocacy

• Show up again in the same communities to build familiarity.
• Deliver on any promise or offer you made in previous conversations.
• Ask one trusted connection for feedback on how you’re perceived—it shows humility and invites openness.

Repeat this cycle consistently, and within weeks you’ll notice a shift: you’ll stop feeling like you’re chasing trust—and start seeing it form naturally around you.

Closing thoughts

If you’re wondering, “Why don’t they trust me yet?”—it doesn’t mean you’re falling short. It means you’re still building your bridge from visibility to belief.

Trust isn’t instant. It’s human. It’s patient. It’s emotional investment over time.

When you show up with humanity, generosity, and consistency—people don’t just notice you… they trust you. And they take your name forward.

A community built that way isn’t just a crowd—it becomes a force that carries your mission farther than any campaign ever could.