By Akua Powell

Let me ask you something: Have you ever felt like you’re doing all the things you’re supposed to be doing, but deep down, something just doesn’t feel right? I know I have. I worked hard to achieve what society told me was “success”—climbing the ladder, ticking off all the boxes. But even with all that, there were moments when I felt like I was living someone else’s story. That’s when I discovered the power of unbecoming.

Unbecoming, for me, wasn’t about falling apart (though sometimes it felt like that). It was about peeling away everything I thought I had to be to find who I was underneath it all. It wasn’t glamorous, but it was real, and it’s been the most liberating thing I’ve ever done. And here’s the thing—I’m still on this journey. I haven’t arrived at some final destination where everything makes perfect sense. But that’s the beauty of it. In a world that’s always telling us to add more—to do more, be more—what if the real answer is to let go of what’s not ours in the first place? To keep peeling back the layers, trusting that the journey itself is where we find our truest selves.

The Journey Begins with Letting Go:
I’ll be honest with you: unbecoming doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a messy, beautiful, sometimes terrifying journey of letting go. Letting go of labels, roles, and expectations—whether they came from our families, society, or even ourselves. It’s like wearing a mask for so long that you forget it’s even there. And then one day, you start to peel it off. You take a deep breath, and for the first time in a long time, you feel the sun on your skin.

My own journey started when I finally allowed myself to admit that I wasn’t happy. I had spent years climbing a ladder at times I wasn’t sure I wanted to be on, and suddenly, everything I had worked for felt hollow. The pandemic forced me into solitude, and in that quiet space, I found something I didn’t expect—myself. I found that underneath the pressure to achieve and perform was a person who longed for something different: freedom, authenticity, and yes, a little adventure.

Unbecoming Takes Courage (You’ve Got More Than You Think):
Unbecoming takes courage—stepping into the unknown and trusting you’ve got more of it than you think. But let’s be honest, fear shows up here too. It’s the kind of fear that whispers doubts in your ear, trying to hold you back. Yet, fear is not something to eliminate—it’s something to face, to move through, because on the other side of fear is the freedom to truly become who you are. And here’s the truth: I’m still on this journey too. Unbecoming isn’t a destination; it’s a path I’m walking every day. I don’t have it all figured out, but what I do know is that awareness is everything. The more I lean into this process, the more I trust that I’m on the right path, and that’s where the power lies—right in the heart of the journey itself.

Adventure (Not Just the Kind You Find on a Map):
When people hear “adventure,” they often think of far-off destinations, backpacking through the mountains, or taking a leap into the great unknown. Don’t get me wrong—I love those kinds of adventures. I’ve spent time exploring incredible places, immersing myself in different cultures, and pushing the limits of my comfort zone. But there’s another kind of adventure that’s just as important—the kind that happens inside.

The inner adventure is where the real magic happens. It’s about exploring the parts of ourselves we’ve kept hidden, the dreams we’ve pushed aside, the fears we’ve buried deep. It’s about daring to ask ourselves, “What do I want?” And then having the courage to go after it. I’ve seen this kind of transformation happen time and time again—both in my own life and in the lives of the incredible women I’ve had the privilege to work with. The more we’re willing to explore within, the more we discover just how vast and limitless our lives can be.

Authenticity—Your Secret Superpower:
Here’s something I wish more people understood: Authenticity is your superpower. When you strip away the roles, the labels, and the expectations, what’s left is you—and that’s exactly who the world needs. We spend so much time trying to be what we think others want us to be, but the truth is, the only thing we really need to be is ourselves.

It took me a long time to learn that. For years, I thought I had to fit into a certain box to be successful, to be respected, to be “enough.” But when I started unbecoming—when I started showing up as the real, messy, imperfect me—something amazing happened. I found that people weren’t just okay with it; they were drawn to it. My relationships deepened, my work became more meaningful, and for the first time, I felt truly aligned with who I was meant to be.

Living authentically isn’t just about being true to yourself; it’s about creating a life that feels like yours, from the inside out. It’s about doing things that light you up, even if they don’t make sense to anyone else. It’s about following your path, even when it’s a little off the beaten trail. And let me tell you—it’s worth it.

So, What Does Unbecoming Look Like for You?
Here’s the part where I turn the question back to you: What could unbecoming look like in your life? Maybe it’s walking away from a job that’s draining you. Maybe it’s setting boundaries in relationships that no longer serve you. Or maybe it’s navigating the complexities of a major life shift—becoming a “free nester” as your children grow and leave the home, rediscovering who you are after decades of putting others first. Perhaps it’s stepping into a new chapter of life after a big move or significant loss, allowing yourself to embrace change rather than resist it. Maybe it’s simply giving yourself permission to be who you are without apology, letting go of the need to meet everyone else’s expectations. Whatever it looks like, know this: The journey to unbecoming is yours to define. There’s no right or wrong way to do it. It’s about listening to your inner voice, trusting your instincts, and following the path that feels true to you.

The Invitation:
Here’s my invitation to you: What if you stopped trying to be everything to everyone and started being exactly who you are? What if, instead of striving to do more, you allowed yourself to be more—more authentic, more courageous, more adventurous? What if you let go of the idea that you have to have it all figured out and trust that who you are is enough?

The power of unbecoming is that it’s not about finding yourself; it’s about freeing yourself. And that, my friend, is where your true power lies.

If you’d like to learn more about my journey and how I help women there, you can find me on Instagram, LinkedIn, or visit my website. I’d love to connect with you.