Nicole Beissler – The Recipe for Never Giving Up
By Viktorija Getneryte
Nicole Beissler is an educated ‘Strategic Coach’ and ‘Commercial Excellence Director’ at “DS Smith Plastics Division”. She has an extensive knowledge of Business Strategy, Management and Marketing with years of experience in the corporate world. Nicole comes from an abusive childhood and two failed marriages that have left deep wounds on her confidence and way of living. However, Nicole has since found the strength to rise above everything that happened in the past and is now a successful businesswoman helping companies to develop and establish a more mindfulness focused work atmosphere, while combining Yoga practice with Coaching. She also has plans to implement innovative water treatment plants in Spain and to improve water quality.
What experiences influenced who you are today?
Well, life is a constant journey, and everyone has their own experiences both good and bad. In the past I often thought I only had ‘bad experiences’ until I realised that the bad experiences moulded me into the person who I am today – and I am absolutely grateful for all of them.
My mother was only 17 when she became pregnant with me without really knowing
that she was already depressed by that time. She married my father and I only remember her as being depressed and drunk. All my childhood I was told, “You were an accident. I wish you didn’t exist as without you my life would be better!” – not to mention the physical abuse on top. When I was 18, I moved away from home and returned again when I was 23 only to only find out that nothing had changed. So, I stopped further contact. It took me a while to find out that, somehow, I had copied the life of my mother. I married young because I was pregnant by accident, went through a very bad custody trial with my first husband, and then married a second time to a drug and alcohol addict who beat the life out of me. I was financially broke twice and I didn´t know how to feed my child. Only when I stopped seeing myself as a victim did I start to improve my life.
How did you manage to overcome all the things that happened to you?
In the early years, I guess every child has a ‘will to live’ which kept me going. And I was also very lucky to have a very caring ‘Granny’ who loved me and always told me how special I was. I believe she was the reason that I learned to build some resilience. Later on, especially when I lost the first custody battle, I thought of suicide. I was just tired of my life. The reason why I didn’t do it was only my beautiful son. The thought of him growing up with a mother who committed suicide enabled me to move on and leave all the bad experiences behind me. It wasn´t always easy with money problems – but seeing him growing – and feeling the need to give him a better future gave me the courage to work hard on myself and build a strong self-esteem, which eventually led me to a successful career and a very happy life.
What would be your advice for a woman that is going through an abusive relationship or is recovering from psychological trauma?
“STOP thinking it is your fault”
STOP thinking it is your fault for a start! This is the most crucial part in accepting that nothing is wrong with you. I always thought everything was my own fault. For example, it was my fault that my parents couldn´t live the life they wanted. It was my fault that I asked for a divorce and therefore I deserved the bad custody battle. It was my fault that I was more intelligent than my second husband and he couldn’t cope with me with words, so he shut me up with violence etc. Once I stopped this type of thinking I gained back my life. So, every woman out there, look in the mirror and tell yourself how beautiful you are. That you deserve someone who loves you and then move on as quick as you can. And never be afraid to ask for help.
Do you believe that we can turn our weaknesses to strengths? And how can we do this?
“I am thankful for all the lessons I got from my life as without them I wouldn’t be the person I am today.”
I am a great fan of working on your strengths and building them up even further – rather than focusing on the weaknesses. But when talking about pain and bad life experiences I am a strong believer that this forms you and makes you strong. So, I see every challenging situation as a new possibility to grow. I am thankful for all the lessons I got from my life as without them I wouldn’t be the person I am today.
Your career history is very colourful. From sales to a chemistry laboratory. What changed your mind to leave the corporate world and to start your own business?
Hahaha. Yes – ‘colourful’ is a nice word to describe it! I have very strong values and that is the key to success. Unfortunately, this is something really rare these days in the corporate world. The reason for all the changes in my past is related to my core values. Every time when I felt a Company wasn’t serving my core values anymore, I left. Now I am 46, and I thought, ‘Now is the best time to start over again…’
How would you describe your business?
This is a very difficult question to answer at the moment. If I say I am a ‘Personal Coach’ it wouldn’t give the full picture. I would like to see myself as a Coach who brings humanity back into the corporate world. And also, to combine Yoga practice with Coaching. Everyone who has already had a coaching session knows how exhausting this can be because we are focused on our mind. We try to figure out an answer through communication in some way. Practicing yoga helps us to be more balanced. Away from our pure mind-focus to a more body-focused thinking. With meditation we sometimes find better answers to our questions – so this is part of my work as well. This helps us to listen to our body more and more. It makes us more open for our “gut feelings” again. And this leads me back to my first comment: ‘Bring humanity back to the Companies’. I would like to see myself helping Companies to develop and establish a more mindfulness focused work atmosphere.
You have done a lot of volunteer work. Do you think it is important to give back to our society?
Yes, I believe that we are on this beautiful planet for just one reason: serving each other. And there is nothing which is more rewarding than helping someone else. And this hasn’t necessarily all been ‘volunteer work’. It could also be sharing your life experiences to help someone to overcome their struggles in life. I strongly believe in energy exchange. The energy we are sending out is balanced by the energy we are receiving. The more we are giving, the more comes back.
As a businesswoman what are the biggest challenges that you face now?
To decide in which direction to focus my energy to the fullest extent as I am still employed and working as a ‘Commercial Excellence Director’. I would like to share the expertise I have gained over the years as a Consultant. I believe that a lot of Companies are too focused on numbers instead of focusing on their people – because at the end of the day, if you have good people they will automatically lead to better numbers. So, for me, it is a challenge to find the Companies open to new thinking. I would love to combine my business know-how with my personal passion and urge more people to ‘grow’.
What are your future plans? And how are you planning to achieve them?
The next big step will be to relocate myself permanently to Spain. We bought a house there last year and I really enjoy this beautiful country. How do I achieve that? First of all, I am thinking it through in all its beautiful colours and I see myself living there by Summer 2019. What am I doing to achieve it?
Well, Mirela Sula and I need to have a chat about opening up a ‘Global Woman Club’ in Alicante, since I believe Spain with the economy slowly recovering absolutely needs it. What about an opening in October 2019? It’s a possibility! Also, the water quality in Spain is not very good and I am in contact with a German Company that builds water treatment machinery (I already have one in my Spanish home) that gives a quality like spring water. I see myself giving lectures about water all over the country and selling the machinery together with a lot of other passionate Spanish women, whom I am constantly coaching to help them have a better life.
In January I have already scheduled a women’s workshop entitled, “Love yourself – do it like Pippi”, which will combine all the principles I mentioned earlier: Overcoming a low self-esteem, finding your inner child, listening to your body and practising some yoga and meditation. The plan is to build on this and develop a 2-3 day program which could then be held in sunny Spain in a warm, calming energetic area.